Archive
Why can’t the past just be the past? Part I
Greetings Gentle Readers,
I’m back after rather a lengthy absence. First, I want to say thank you to all of you who sent encouraging emails or comments. I know there were no responses, but trust me, they were read. It meant so much to know that people were thinking of me while I was gone.
And some things haven’t changed, my first draft was 3400 words long! So I’ll be splitting this into two parts. The title won’t make much sense until the second post, since this one is essentially an update on what I’ve been up to, but we’ll get there eventually. Continue Reading
Correspondence
Greetings Gentle Readers,
I am struggling with a difficult issue, which is my ability to keep up with and respond to both comments left on the blog and to emails sent to me at my blog email address. I am deeply grateful to everyone who takes the time to write a comment or an email. The community here has been very supportive and very helpful in my journey and both comments and emails have often been very encouraging. One point I want to be crystal clear about, which is that no one has done anything at all wrong in contacting me. I have made my email address available which was most certainly my choice. Continue Reading
The Sticking Place from What a Shrink Thinks
“For some the sticking place is the therapeutic relationship itself, the trust built, brick by brick, between therapeutic partners.”
This is my sticking place (or was for a long time. How lovely to put it in the past!). I have always said therapy is NOT for the faint of heart but takes extraordinary courage. Go read this…
Macbeth: If we should fail?
Lady Macbeth: We fail? But screw your courage to the sticking place, And we’ll not fail.
Macbeth, Act 1, scene 7, 59-61
Committing psychotherapeutic acts takes extraordinary courage.
Facing down anxieties, digging down underneath painful symptoms, revealing vulnerabilities, casting out demons, seeking salvation, asking forgiveness, challenging abuse, severing damaging relationships, examining your failures, flaws, weaknesses, revealing your shames, contending with guilt, grieving, preparing to die, coming out, fighting for intimacy, encountering emptiness, apprehending your own murderousness, and the depths of your hungers and desires, setting limits and boundaries, saying “no”, tolerating exposure, baring your soul, withstanding the pain, changing your life, telling the truth…
Telling the truth.
Holy shit.
These are terrifying acts.
I can think of no psychotherapeutic action that does not require courage.
I cannot think of a single split second of the 30 years I have spent engaged…
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Be Gone for a Bit
Greetings Gentle Readers,
I know I have not been around much lately, but I’m going to be around even less for a bit. For starters I am heading into an extremely busy period at work. We have a very documentation intensive release going out the end of October and my only hope of making my deadlines is to start hitting it pretty hard now. I’ll be working longer hours and some weekends, so I am afraid I am not really going to have the time and energy for the blog right now.
I have also decided I just need to step away from the internet for a bit. It is still possible to email me at the address on my blog but I will not be answering any emails until after this release has gone out. I appreciate everyone’s patience and understanding.
For any readers from Psychcafe, I have also turned off my PM’s, so please don’t take it personally if you try to contact me and it bounces.
Take care, AG
Encouragement for Those Who Are Weary
Greetings gentle readers,
I ran across an old song I haven’t heard in years that I wanted to share. I loved the song when it first came out in 1979 (for those of you born after that year, there is no need to point out how long ago that was, I was a senior in high school. Trust me, I know how long ago that was. 😀 ) but it speaks even more strongly to me today. It has been such a struggle to learn about how to handle the inevitable pain of life, in some other way than futilely attempting to avoid it. One of the best lessons taught to me by BN is that while pain is inevitable, the answer to pain is love. (See The relationship of love and pain and Love is the Answer for more detailed explanations of that truth). The love we find by connecting to other people, by sharing our burdens, by holding each other up. That is where we find the strength to face life challenges. Continue Reading
That’s enough now
I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment; actually part of being overwhelmed is not really knowing how I’m feeling. And not sure where to start to explain, so this may be a bit round-about and confusing. Bear with me. Continue Reading
Not quite the rest I was hoping for…
Greeting Gentle Readers,
I still have a number of comments to catch up on, but it’s been slow going. We got back about a week ago from a vacation, during which I had fully intended to get caught up, that did not prove very restful or relaxing. A couple of days into the trip (before I flew down to join my husband and daughter), my van broke down and had to be towed to a dealership over 100 miles away (springing for the better AAA membership TOTALLY paid off). Turned out to be a bad alternator and a bad battery damaged by the alternator. They needed to order parts, so my husband and daughter left my van behind and continued southward in her car. She had driven separately as when we finished our vacation, she was off to a conference. Continue Reading
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