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Archive for the ‘psychotherapy blogs’ Category

Therapist’s Self-Disclosure

August 26, 2013 1 comment

Ran across a great article on the web by a therapist who specializes in training other therapist’s about self-disclosure in therapy and thought other people might find it interesting also: Think Before You Get Personal By Janine Roberts.

I am still working to catch up on answering all the wonderful, supportive comments I got through the recent disruption; I appreciate everyone’s patience. Work is ramping up for the next six weeks or so, so I may be a bit on the scarcer side. And GE, I have NOT forgotten about the post I owe you on coping with grief! Take care all. 🙂

Must Read Blog

February 24, 2013 9 comments

I just found a really valuable blog written by Dr. Jeffrey Smith, a psychiatrist who works in Scarsdale, NY. I want to thank his reader K who very kindly linked to my blog, which is how I found Moments of Change. He writes with incredible clarity, and compassion about therapy, how it heals, and the therapeutic relationship while providing insight into the therapist’s side of the relationship. Go read this man! Start with this article Attachment to your Therapist II and its follow-up, Part III: How Relationships Transform.

UPDATE: Sorry, start here! Attachment to Your Therapist

BEST. DESCRIPTION. EVER.

Fantastic Book on Your Brain and How to Get Along with it.

August 20, 2012 1 comment

I am presently reading a really good book on our brains and how they work. I’m still reading it, but already know it’s worth recommending. The book is The User’s Guide to the Human Mind: Why Our Brains Make Us Unhappy, Anxious, and Neurotic and What We Can Do about It. The author, Shawn T. Smith, Psy.D.,  is a psychologist whose blog, Ironshrink,  I have followed for a while. This is his first book and wow, did he hit the ground running. The book addresses the basic premise that our brains have evolved not to make us happy, but to make sure we survive. But we now live in a different environment than that in which our brains evolved and so have life and death reactions to situations that aren’t. I wish I had been able to read this book awhile back. The author lays out , in a very clear and concise manner, why we think and react the way we do and how we can learn to step back from our feelings and be more deliberate in how we act. How we can learn to live with our brains, instead of fighting them.

This is a book written for laymen and very clearly so. It also contains a lot of simple, easy to implement, mindfulness exercises to teach you how to take control of your brain and your feelings so that you can choose how to react based on your values. For anyone struggling to heal from disorganized attachment and all the trust struggles that can occur based on their history of abuse, this book is a treasure. It provides a lot of insight into why we behave as we do, normalizes that behavior and offers solutions for coping with our maladaptive beliefs.

The “L” word Part I

February 14, 2012 15 comments

So far all of the writing I have been doing here  has concerned my healing history so to speak. Stories of work I have already done and lessons learned. I’m going to deviate from that and actually talk about what’s going on with me right now. Partially because I think it would be helpful for others to hear about it, but also because I am working through this and struggling to understand what it means and how it fits in my understanding of who I am. When I talk about the past, a past about which I have had a chance to reflect, the stories can come out in such an orderly fashion, like little perfectly wrapped packages with a gift bow when the reality was actually an experience of raw confusion. I thought it might be helpful to see the raw confusion as it was happening.

I’m going to talk about the “L” word. Yes, that four letter word we avoid like the black plague in therapy: Love. Have you ever noticed that the shorter the word in English, the more confusing talking about it’s meaning is? I mean the long words like antidisestablishmentarianism  have very specific meanings. But say “God” or “love” or “happy” and suddenly you have a very long, complex conversation on your hands.  So one thing I do want to note is that throughout this post when I discuss BN loving me, I very much mean it as a parental kind of love, a love which seeks my good, not in any romantic or erotic sense. I don’t believe that there is an erotic or romantic component to his love for me. But if there was, I’d be the last person on the planet to ever know about it anyway. But I’ve never picked up on anything along those lines. Continue Reading

Great article from a new blog I just discovered

February 3, 2012 6 comments

I found a new blog by a psychotherapist (h/t to WG of Therapy Tales fame) which I found to be really interesting. She had one post on the purpose of payment in the psychotherapuetic relationship that I found both illuminating and reassuring. (For the record, I have slipped into both the “how pathetic, I have to pay to have an intimate relationship” and “this isn’t real, it’s simulated because I pay you” interpretations.) I think a lot of people might find this helpful to read. If you like this one, you might want to check out the other posts also, there’s a lot of good stuff. I’ll be adding her to my blog roll. 🙂

what a shrink thinks: What You Pay For