Tales of a Boundary Ninja

Seem to be getting lots of queries about erotic transference, otherwise known as falling for your shrink.  Since I specialize in treating men, thought I’d take a crack at the subject from the particular angle of male patient/female therapist.

Male patients – all patients – bring to therapy the gender role expectations, attitudes and behaviors they experience in their other male-female relationships. But because the doctor/patient  relationship  in psychotherapy is a unique – and often new – experience, male patients often do not know quite how to proceed.  And this can make for discomfort difficult to tolerate.  For both the patient and his therapist.

In part this is so because there are so few models for an intimate professional relationship.   In fact, it’s often rare for a man to have a relationship that is intellectually and emotionally intimate but with no physical/sexual intimacy.  They tend to go together for many, if…